Podcast Ep. 10: The 6 Biggest Mistakes Women Lawyers Make on the Pathway to Partnership
In this episode, I wanted to do something a little different. Rather than focusing on one specific topic, I walk you through the key ideas from my guide on how to make partner in your law firm. My aim is to give you a more reflective framework so you can think more deliberately about what partnership really means for you and whether it truly aligns with what you want.
One of the things I see all the time when I coach women lawyers is that many have become disconnected from their feelings. When I ask how they feel, they tell me what they think. But your feelings are critical information, especially when you are making a decision as significant as whether to go for partnership. The reality is that partnership, particularly in larger firms, can require enormous sacrifices. It is worth taking the time to think this through properly.
The first mistake I often see is treating partnership as simply the next step. It is not just a promotion. When you become a partner, you are also becoming a business owner. Some lawyers truly love the law and want to spend their time doing legal work. Others enjoy that but are also curious about building a business, developing clients, and leading teams. It is important to be honest with yourself about which category you fall into before you commit to this path.
The second mistake is not defining what you actually want from a law firm. I see many women lawyers assuming they need to adapt to their firm’s culture rather than asking whether it is the right fit for them. I encourage you to get really clear on your values and your priorities. There may be certain things that are non negotiable for you, such as being treated with respect or having the flexibility to spend time with your family. There will also be things that are nice to have but not essential. The clearer you are, the better decisions you will make.
The third mistake is not building a robust support network. You cannot do this on your own. Support can come in many forms: emotional support, mentors, sponsors, coaches, and professional connections who can refer work to you. It also includes your life outside the firm, such as your partner or family. Having the right people around you can make a significant difference to your experience and your success.
The fourth mistake is failing to plan for the development of non legal skills. Being a great lawyer is not enough to succeed as a partner. You will need to know how to bring in work, manage finances, lead a team, handle difficult conversations, and think strategically. Some firms will help you develop these skills, but many will not do so in a structured way. That means you need to take ownership of your development and think proactively about what you need to learn.
The fifth mistake is relying too much on your firm to manage your career. Even if your firm has excellent programs, you cannot afford to be passive. You need to take responsibility for your own progression, your network, and your skills. I always encourage lawyers to think about what they need and then go out and find a way to get it. Sometimes that means doing something creative or unexpected to build a skill or fill a gap.
Finally, the most damaging mistake I see is staying invisible. This can show up in many ways: not speaking up in meetings, avoiding opportunities to be visible, or not building relationships with key decision makers. I want to be clear that this is not about blame. There are real structural reasons why this happens. But within that reality, there are still small steps you can take. Start by identifying where you are holding back, and then challenge yourself to take small, manageable actions to increase your visibility and confidence.
If you take one thing away from this episode, I would encourage you to try a simple exercise. Write down these six mistakes and ask yourself honestly where you are today in each area. Then choose one small action that would move you forward. It might be speaking up in a meeting, reaching out to someone in your network, or deciding which skill you want to develop next.
The path to partnership is not just about meeting external expectations. It is about making intentional choices, building the right skills, and defining success on your own terms. You do not have to do this on your own, and you get to decide what success looks like for you.